Saturday, October 15, 2005

Replay of moments

Life seems to cruise along smooth and eventless. Suddenly, I feel something heavy in my head and my mind races! I feel that, this very sequence of moments has already happened in my life. But I couldn't say when. I couldn't say what is going to be next. But when the next moment becomes current, my mind yells out "Yes, this is it! I have gone through this too!". It keeps happening again and again for sometime after which I am no longer so sure about whether I am still in the replay mode. Then those moments fade quietly and here I am, back to the present! I try to go over those moments once again, trying to locate when it has happened. But not once could I do it till date. I feel that it is unfair and live on it for a little while. But before long, I completely forget about it and get on with my life. All that is left now is that there had been moments when I felt that they have already happened in my life. I don't even remember what those moments were! My companions have confessed to have gone through such an experience themselves.

It has been a long time since such a thing has happened to me. It has been long since I have talked about it to anybody. I wonder if anybody still goes through such an experience. I instinctively feel that it would be a rarity. Rarer still would be to find people who actually know why such things happen and identify the situation when the replay was actually "live". Rarer still would be for such people to spot this weblog and respond!


Anonymous said...

badri, i actually typed my response once i read this blog... but due to some reason i had to leave so i logged out of my pc... these words are not the same i wrote before... but i think its similar :D:D:D

the scenario u have explained is one of the strange behaviours of our ingenious organ - brain... one funny thing abt our brain is, it will try to think and understand itself... i mean it is our brain thinking and trying to understand abt itself... dont u think its amazing... i think our life will be very boring if our brain know abt it very well... :)) it will occur as if, "...phew, i know whats gonna happen next..."

brain in some strange fashion records things by forming those neural networks... in time, the strength of those networks weakens and hence that memory gets burried in somewhere... some stimulus brings it back alive and we try to extrapolate on that and try hard to figure out the missing pieces... and hence i believe we get this amazing feeling of - "oh man! i have experienced it before or i have been part of this before but could not recollect when"...


Badhri said...

Well, what can I say? You seem to know more about the brain than a comman man would! I can connect to what you are saying with the Deja Vu